Column:
Let college students make their own mistakes
Published Oct. 5, 2007
Being a functioning pseudo-adult is harder than it looks.
Take, for example, the college student. The thrill that presents itself for the first few months of being out on one's own swiftly wears off and is replaced by a nagging responsibility and weariness with oneself.
But don't feel bad; I was going to do the dishes and pay rent the other day, too.
I say pseudo-adult deliberately. Let's just be honest: Who actually pays for their own apartment? Nearly all of us still have a safety net in place, and y'all know that when utilities are due, the first person you speed dial is your mother.
That being said, and while the majority of our most pressing needs - tuition, shelter, food and clothing to some extent - have been taken care of by our parents, the load of having to actually function on our own for the first time is still pretty heavy.
My rent was due three days ago, and I can't find the electricity bill because my roommates and I have not cleaned in, oh, about a month. The glittery idea of being in college necessitates rushing around, working on papers, networking and tequila - at the same time, if you'd like - and I think we would all rather freak out about what we are going to do for the rest of lives rather than organize the kitchen.
I'm not certain that the pre-adult gets as much credit as he or she is due. Along with requisite functioning, nearly everyone I know is doing remarkable things. My roommate came out a year ago, almost everyone in my building has been an editor for this newspaper at one point or another and I got certified as an emergency medical technician at age 18. I know a student who is living with cancer.
What I find most interesting is the different ways in which people choose to put their energies into functioning. One of the most put-together people I know, who has been some kind of editor for this paper for a year and a half now, still manages to make a pot of coffee every morning at the same time and wears a tie every day almost didn't get into the School of Journalism because of his grades. Another friend of mine, a dedicated student and one of the most well-read individuals I know, has no interpersonal skills. He ended up transferring schools because everyone here hated him so much.
Don't misunderstand me here. I don't mean to say we should be given a free pass when some area of our lives goes awry, because it is likely some other part of it is blooming without control. There are some people who are just incapable of doing anything due to laziness, terrible parenting or a general misunderstanding of how the world works. I live remarkably close to one of those.
I am merely saying the next time one of us disappoints you or fails to meet requirements, don't immediately become enraged. Take a moment. Breathe (stretch, shake, let it go). Try to remember what's good about the crushing lows and breathless highs at this point in your life, which is unanimously agreed upon to be the most unique time, and give us room to work.
But don't protect us; do not keep us from failing time and time again. We will learn. And I will pay my rent tomorrow.