"How I Am" highlights True/False opening at Ragtag

By Erica Zucco

Published Feb. 28, 2008

Audience members started filling up the "Little Ragtag" 20 minutes or so before the first screening of the True/False Film Fest at Ragtag Cinemacafe began. A man dressed in a plaid scarf, jacket and jeans ripped at the knee sat in a chair at the from of the room, slowly shifting back and forth as he whistled, sang and strummed gently on his guitar.

"People need to tell each other how they feel before they go sailing away," Redd Hunter sang. Hunter came all the way from Austin, Texas for the festival, which isn't just about film. Music is also a big part of the weekend.

Show-goers were greeted by volunteer Ellen Dugger, a Columbia resident who agreed to "help make the exciting event happen" by taking tickets and making sure things run smoothly at the festival. Volunteers also received passes to see movies throughout the weekend.

"I'm volunteering today and tomorrow, but Saturday and Sunday, I'll be watching lots of movies," Dugger said with a smile.

Three of those show-goers were Columbia residents Marti Waigandt, Lisa Presner and Carol Moseley. None of the women had attended the True/False before due to either being out of town or other commitments, but were all excited about the experience. Moseley was volunteering throughout the weekend, and Waigandt and Presner bought passes for film showings. The women planned to see at least 10 films throughout the weekend.

"We're excited to see movies like "Shake the Devil Off" and "The Mosquito Problem,"" especially," Waigandt said.

The three women munched on popcorn before the show began, but less traditional movie snacks were common. Pastries, granola bars, hot chocolate and beer, typical munchies served in accordance with the Ragtag's laidback atmosphere, were available outside the theater.

Before the film were two shorts. The first, "Days and Hours," came from San Francisco. It highlighted St. Boniface Church, which opens its doors every weekday so that homeless people can come to sleep for eight hours. The entire film was footage of people sleeping on the pews, with audio in the background of people explaining what they did before they were homeless. Bankers, truck drivers and farmers all ended up in the church for various reasons, many of them not at fault for the troubles that they faced. Viewers were encouraged to visit sbnc.wordpress.com for more information on the program.

The second short, "Peter and Ben," was sent in from London and featured a man who lived in solitude in a quiet valley and who came across a sheep that he cared for. As the sheep grew old, he let it go, but it eventually ran back home.

The first few minutes of "How I Am" were silent, showing a teenage boy reaching his hands out and catching snowflakes as they fell softly.

The film showcased Patrick Wanker, a young autistic boy who has trouble communicating verbally but has a passionate desire to connect with other people. Striking cinematography highlighted very normal events: Patrick living at home, at school and outside. The filmmakers had interviewed Wanker and he had answered questions through "facilitated communication," meaning his mother held his hand as he typed each letter to his answers. Answers were displayed in subtitles over the video, and Patrick's words were surprising, personal and beautiful.

Wanker lived with his caring, invested mother and father as well as two younger brothers, one of who was autistic and the other who was not. The silent understanding the two autistic brothers shared was entrancing; the way that they knew what the other was thinking and what would make the other happy was surprising yet natural.

"It is difficult to communicate with me, Patrick who talks very little," Patrick had typed. Patrick desperately wanted to connect with the kids at school, who "go out, go to movies and play video games," but felt a large distance in between himself the other children. Instead of speaking, he wanted to hug, to hold hands and kiss, but many kids at school were afraid. After the film, the filmmakers said they showed the movie at Patrick's school and afterwards, many of them attended an 18th birthday party for Patrick and showed much more understanding and friendliness.

"Please, no pity," Patrick said. "But sympathy, and simply no fear of contact."

Patrick's innate connection with nature was inspiring and enchanting. He loved animals, who always "accept people, whether or not they have problems," and the sky.

"The sky looks sad today," Patrick said as it was raining. "Because it does not show the blue. The best colors are strong; they paint the day."

Patrick said he hoped to one day became self-sufficient, but did not feel that it would happen. His other hope is to be loved for who he is.

"You can't explain love because it is something that emerges from the heart," Patrick said. "It is not rational, its wonderful, an incredibly sensation. It makes everything else insignificant. Only the person who steals your heart can influence your mind. If I like a girl, I try to be near her and show her in gestures. It will be different than being in a normal relationship, but I want someone to share the beautiful moments with -- and the bad ones, as well."

Beautiful moments come often in Patrick's life; "How I Am" is a poignant portrayal of the emotions that come with disconnection in a world you wish to feel connected with, and a must-see for anyone with an interest in people, love, or life.