Transgender students open dialogue on transgender issues
The panel was part of Trans Awareness Week.
Published Nov. 19, 2010
Senior Emily Colvin identifies as a female. Sophomore Alyx Marema identifies as a boy or gender-optional. Senior Kayden Prinster identifies as a male. Graduate student Dakota Raynes doesn’t identify as a specific gender.
What all four panelists who made up Tuesday’s Trans Panel have in common is they do not identify as the gender they were genetically assigned.
For the dialogue, which was a part of this year’s Trans Awareness Week, the four panelists divulged their personal coming out stories, as well as shared their thoughts on various transgender issues.
“I was reading Wikipedia and I was doing research on trans people because my friend was writing a story on a trans person,” Prinster said. “I was reading the definition and I was like, ‘Oh, shit. I’m trans. I guess I have to do something about this.’”
A few days later, Prinster said he had already purchased breast binders. He had officially begun living life as a male. Growing up in what he described as a very gender fluid household, Prinster said he didn’t even know what being a girl meant other than the fact that he was supposed to be one.
Marema wasn’t able to comprehend a disparity between genders either.
“Gender itself has never really been a big deal for me.” Marema said. “I understand that there are girl clothes and boy clothes, but I never could really understand how you could act like a girl or act like a boy. I just can’t comprehend it.”
As a result, he never really attempted to play out the role commonly attached to his biological sex.
“I just acted like me,” Marema said. “That usually meant playing with lots of Hot Wheels and then putting them in my dump truck and making them crash. Then using them to, like, run over Barbie.”
His girlfriend, Colvin, said her transition process was initially difficult.
“I got really depressed because I was focusing on my gender identity so much,” Colvin said. “I didn’t want it to be true, but it was.”
After accepting her true identity as a female, her situation improved. Her first time living as a female was sophomore year, when she came to MU.
Unlike the other panelists, Raynes did not begin identifying as transgendered until ze was 24 years old.
“I was that little girl who got into trouble all the time for getting too dirty and playing too rough, but I didn’t really understand that there was something I could do about that,” Raynes said. “I focused my own self discovery and exploration on my sexual orientation for the majority of my teenage years.”
Because of this, Raynes has previously identified as bisexual and a lesbian. Ze has a daughter, and said they do a variety of activities together that society associates with specific genders, from changing oil to baking.
“I don’t ever call myself a trans guy,” Raynes said. “I just call myself trans. My daughter primarily calls me dad, but sometimes calls me mom and I’m OK with that. I try to do things with her that are gender fluid. I like to do what makes me happy, and I don’t worry about the things that are attached to that.”
Although all are comfortable with their identities, they do not necessarily feel inclined to tell their stories.
“Most of the time I don’t usually mention it to random passersby,” Prinster said. “But I do usually make an effort to tell people about it when it comes up. I tried to stay closeted once and it was the most awkward time of my life because people just assumed that I had a penis and they kept making penis jokes at me, and I felt like I just didn’t want to be a part of that because I don’t lie. My friends know that. I just don’t lie.”
Still, they do things to better conform to the gender they identify with. For instance, Prinster and Raynes take testosterone shots, and Colvin frequently shaves and occasionally wears make-up.
“I do that so I’m not automatically clocked,” Colvin said. “For the most part though, I don’t actively try to hide.”
Neither does Raynes.
“The longer I identify as trans, the less I give a shit about what everybody else thinks and care more about how I feel in my body,” Raynes said.
All were open with their identities, hoping to dispel any assumptions people might hold about transgender people.
“A lot of times for us it isn’t even the questions that are really that terrible, it’s really more of the assumptions that people make,” Marema said.