Column: Beehive hair, French bread and denim cutoffs: A Halloweekend recap
Unfortunately, I am still sneezing blue paint.
Nov. 06, 2013
The opinions expressed by The Maneater columnists do not represent the opinions of The Maneater editorial board.
As you may know, November has sprung upon us with all the force of a wind gust, similar to the one that nearly knocked me into a giant mud puddle this morning. And as November begins, we — or maybe just I — am reflecting fondly upon the memories made over this Halloween weekend, or as the Disney Channel calls it, Halloweekend.
Halloween this year reared its mask-covered head on a Thursday, allowing a full three days and nights of celebration.
While I normally celebrate this monstrous (heh) holiday by dressing in a sports T-shirt, calling myself a [insert sport here] player and venturing to the local Chipotle for a $3 burrito, followed by eating said burrito alone in my room without any pants, I went, as they say, “all out” this year.
Seeing how it’s most logical to tell our story in chronological order, I’ll start with Thursday, Oct. 31. After going to class and heading home for a long and well-needed afternoon nap, a group of friends and I headed to Chipotle for burritos. I went in a black and white polka-dot dress claiming I was “retro” and my boyfriend went in street clothes and a purple bathrobe for no apparent reason. Regardless of the lack of effort, we got our burritos.
After stuffing my face, the real fun began. The plan for the night was SoCo, Columbia’s resident gay bar, which was holding a drag show that night. What better place to spend your Halloween than a nightclub filled with drag queens?
Due to the nature of said club, this night’s costume demanded outrageous detail and glamour: Amy Winehouse. With winged eyeliner that could fly me to the moon and hair higher than the Empire State Building, I looked, as they say, “on point.” I even went so far as to draw a horseshoe with the words Daddy’s girl surrounding it onto my arm. I decided to opt out of sending my dad a photo.
Once we made our arrival, the dancing began, and I ran into an ex-resident adviser from my previous year in the dorms.
However, my clever rendition of Amy came to an end when I attempted to brush out my curls, breaking a hairbrush and losing three bobby pins in the enormous mess I’d voluntarily turned my hair into. Needless to say, it was time for a trim.
In all, the evening was a great success. One night down, two to go.
The next night’s costume was a little less creative, yet so much more. My roommate Annie and I went for matching outfits this time around. Skinny black pants, striped shirts, red lipstick and what will forever go down in history as the most functional accessory to ever be in my possession: a hollowed-out baguette filled with juice. A drink and a snack for later. By the end of the night, both Annie’s and my loaves of bread had been consumed by a bunch of people I had never met before.
The third and final night of Halloweekend ended with what I can only describe as the most brilliant thing I’ve ever dressed as. Or smattered myself with. Just wait, you’ll find out.
On Saturday night, my boyfriend threw an ever-popular blacklight party, complete with highlighters, glow in the dark Jell-O and neon streamers strewn through the living room. I needed to wear something that would do more than glow. I needed to shine.
So I did what any dedicated Arrested Development fan would do. I painted myself blue, slapped on a fake moustache and donned my best cutoffs. I was, for a night, Tobias Fünke, and I just blue myself.
I am happy to admit that my rendition of Tobias may have been the greatest thing I’ve ever done. It was more than worth the tubes of paint, handprints all over my bathroom and the trashbag my roommate made me wear while riding in her car.
Unfortunately, though, sometimes good costumes come with a cost, which is why I am still, after several days, still cleaning my apartment and sneezing blue paint.