October 21, 2011

By Scott Delhommer

About one in four women will face violence in a relationship, according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.

Working with the MU Counseling Center, the MU Relationship and Sexual Violence Prevention Center put together a workshop from 3 to 4 p.m. Oct. 19 in Chamber Auditorium to spread awareness and help decrease this statistic.

It is no accident the event takes place during Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Although the name on campus is Relationship Violence Awareness Month, the idea is the same.

“It’s national Domestic Violence Awareness Month, but some people on a college campus do not see themselves in a ‘domestic’ relationship because they are not married, but often the same kind of abuse is happening,” RSVP Center coordinator Danica Wolf said.

Although it might be the same sort of abuse, college-aged women are at a higher risk to be abused, Wolf said.

“Women between the ages of 20 and 24 are at greatest risk for abuse, which is a good portion of our campus population,” she said. “We absolutely know that violence is happening to our students.”

Another time when abuse increases for women is during pregnancy. Approximately one-third of all pregnant women are abused, according to The Domestic Violence Sourcebook by Dawn Berry.

“A tool that an abusive partner uses is identifying whatever vulnerability is there and sometimes using that as a tool for power and control,” said Sarah Anthoney, a psychological resident at the MU Counseling Center and speaker at the workshop. “We have even heard instances of pregnant women being punched in the stomach or being thrown down the stairs.”

Many women experiencing abuse do not leave the relationship. Nearly 80 percent of women who have been physically abused by a partner continue to date the abuser after violence occurs, according to an FBI report.

“It’s a very complicated relationship pattern,” said Jenny Lybeck-Brown, psychologist and assistant director of training for the Counseling Center. “Many women will stay with an abuser, not the least of which because of economic reasons. Also fear is a big factor in women or men staying with an abuser, and much of that fear is founded.”

A woman who leaves an abuser has a 75 percent greater chance to be killed than if she stayed, according to the National Crime Victimization Survey from the U.S. Department of Justice.

“The most dangerous time for a victim of relationship violence is right after they leave,” Wolf said. “At that point, the abuser has nothing to lose. That’s a really scary point, and we want to make sure no matter what the person does next, all of the safety nets are in place, so they can be as safe and protected as possible.”

Not all abuse is physical. Verbal abuse or manipulation can be used to abuse as much as a fist can.

“It might not all be physical,” Wolf said. “We know that emotional abuse, verbal abuse, sexual abuse, coercion, manipulation and control are present with the majority of abusive relationships.”

This can be prevented through teaching people about violence in relationships and about how to access resources to address violence, Lybeck-Brown said.

“I think a simple way to boil it down is that we need to be educating all students on what I think of as good relationship conduct,” she said. “Then, it’s also important for them to know if they are in a situation where things aren’t right or things are abusive that there are resources and a way to get out.”

The RSVP Center already has a prevention system, the Green Dot Strategy, on campus. Students can participate in a variety of ways, including wearing Green Dot buttons on backpacks or clothing.

“Green Dot is the primary prevention strategy we use,” Wolf said. “We can raise awareness and continue to help survivors. We can continue to do the intervention and the advocacy, but ultimately, we have to prevent. This has to end.”